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How to create a warm and secure attachment relationship with baby, and why it is vitally important.

Learning goals

  • Understand what attachment is and why it's important.
  • Be able to recognise the difference between secure and insecure attachment.

Background

What is attachment and how does it happen?

‘Attachment’ describes the first relationship a newborn has with their primary caregiver. Attachment develops in the first 2 years when babies are responded to and gently touched and nurtured.

  • A child who experiences positive, attentive, warm relationships with close people in the early years is learning to trust the world. It helps them build a strong foundation in their brain for all their future learning and relationships.
  • The converse is also true – negative, inconsistent or harsh treatment in the early years will influence the brain’s permanent structures and functions. The brains of children with secure attachment are wired differently to those with insecure attachment.
  • A baby’s experiences of love, trust and stimulation, and where their primary relationship is treated as the highest priority, will wire up a brain that will serve them well for the rest of their life.
  • A secure attachment is a key protective factor that is likely to positively influence a child’s life outcomes.
  • When whānau create consistent, warm, loving relationships with their children, other aspects of parenting will go much better.

Share ideas about attachment

In pairs, ask the participants to list all of the things they do with their babies that may help to build strong connections in their brain.

With the full group, ask them to discuss what daily activities they do with baby that encourage a healthy and secure attachment.

Make a chart of the answers and fill in any gaps using the list below:

  • respond to baby quickly
  • make eye contact
  • give lots of loving touch
  • consistent routines that meet baby’s needs and adapt as their needs change
  • show interest in what baby is doing or has their attention on
  • tune in to baby’s cues
  • talk, sing, read or play.

Pairs can then review their own list, mark off ones that are on the full group’s list and share any other answers with the group.

Ask the group:

  • How might each action help in developing the relationship between whānau and their baby?
  • What might we see if these things aren’t happening for pēpi?
  • How might a baby feel if they’re not consistently comforted in a loving way when they’re upset, and don’t have enough positive interactions?

List the signs of an insecure attachment:

  • lack of trust in people
  • not reaching developmental milestones
  • fear of exploring or learning
  • prefers to be alone
  • isolates themselves.

Discuss what each sign means.

Workshop materials 

  • Pens and paper
  • Chart paper or whiteboard